Mindset is everything: Why you aren't hitting your goals?

Good morning. Happy Monday. Hope you guys had an amazing weekend. Welcome back to my channel. I was thinking a lot about what I wanted to share on this motivation mindset Monday, and I think what's gonna end up happening is even though I have all these things in my ideas ... excuse me. Even though I have all these ideas in my head of what I want to share, each week something relevant is gonna come up and I'm gonna want to talk about that anyway.

I got a message on Instagram. I was chatting with somebody and they were talking about how they work a 9-5, and I was like, "Awesome. Do you love your job?" They're like, "Yeah, you know, I like it, but I wish that if I could make the kind of money I'm making now on my own, I would definitely want to do that." It just made me realize that there is a big gap in people's mindset of what is possible and what they can achieve and I really want to talk a little bit today about self-limiting beliefs and how we are ... we're creating our future based on these beliefs, even if they're not necessarily true.

That one in particular, tons of people make great money on their own without working for a place. So for that particular person, she just in her head felt like she didn't have ... she for some reason wasn't worth it or didn't have the skills or anything like that. I think it's important to remember whatever you think that you don't have, there's always ... there's always somebody who had less that still made it happen.

A lot of it is I think more than anything, it's about mindset, and I don't want to make this too confusing, but what I will say is this, so 95 ... for most people, 95% of the time what we're doing, our actions that we're taking, are totally subconscious, meaning we're really not even thinking about it. Think about ... the best way to describe this is have you ever driven somewhere and you got there and you were like, "How did I get here?" You didn't remember driving there at all. That's because you're completely acting from your subconscious brain. It was just auto pilot. We live so much of our life in auto pilot. This is brain science, not just me throwing out stats. It says about 95% of the time we're living in that space. We're just moving based on our past conditioning.

For a lot of us, that sets us up to be really limited for what we do from here on out because if our past tells us, "Oh, I've only gotten this far before," then when we get to that point again, it's gonna be hard for us to push past it and to become a better version of ourself.

For me, this knowledge was such freedom, because this last year has been such a year of transformation and growth, and it's been really, really intense, because what's happening is I'm meeting with those past perceived boundaries and now all of a sudden I'm like, "Well, I wanna go there."

It takes a lot of awareness. It's bringing attention to these things that we're not normally aware of, bringing more presence into our life, which is why for me yoga has been so powerful, because so much of what yoga is is bringing yourself more into the present moment so you're doing less things on auto pilot and more things from a space of conscious awareness, so you have a choice.

One of these ... one of my favorite quotes that when my teacher ... one of my yoga teachers, his name is Rod Stryker, he had said in the training I did with him, "If you don't consciously choose your future, your past will choose it for you." I'll repeat it. If you don't consciously choose your future, your past will choose it for you. See, even the puppy's excited about that.

That's a ... really take a moment to think about that, and it's because of what I was talking about. We have these conditionings in our brain that tell us that things have always been a certain way. I don't know if you guys have ever had that experience where like you had a goal and you just couldn't quite seem to ... some people it's with say like weight loss, which is a story maybe for another day, a video for another day, because I do have some opinions on focusing on weight loss versus focusing on health, but regardless, have you ever gotten to a point where you just like can't seem to get past it?

What's another good example? Let's say you were starting a new eating healthy routine, and you get through the first day, you get through the second day, but then the third day somebody tempts you ... there's some temptation and you totally give in and then it all goes out the window and you're done. Then the next time you go around and do it, it's like when you get to that day three, you're at this threshold again of like, "Well, I've only ever consistently held these eating habits for three days," and so getting past that day three is gonna be the hardest thing. Then once you get past that, then you can start to push further and further and realize that you're capable of so much more and you start to reprogram those thought patterns.

Instead of just talking at you any longer, I am going to hop in the car and go hang out with a friend and we have been both working through this kind of things a lot in the last year. We've been in a big year of personal growth and I'm just excited to pick her brain a little bit as well. I will ... I'll bring you guys along.

Being a dog mom now, I have to bring so many more things when I go anywhere.

So we're ... I just got to Eliza's house and we're hanging out. She's making a little brunch, some brunch, and we're hanging out by the door because she has a cool little fenced back yard so we're just letting the puppy kind of run around but not have our eyes totally off of her. It's so cool. I was telling you guys about what I wanted the topic for this to be today and I didn't tell Eliza that I was gonna come and interview her so I'm sorry. I'm so grateful for all my friends that let me spring this on them. But, what was crazy is I was telling her about what I wanted us to share about and she was saying she just went to an event last night that was totally about this and I haven't really heard much about it yet. What were your favorite take aways?

Yeah, so I went to this event last night that was all about really mindset and about limiting beliefs and working with unconscious behaviors and things like that, so a lot of what I learned and my biggest take away was ... and it may seem so simple, but a lot of our limiting beliefs come from childhood and what ... something that maybe like some trauma, it doesn't even necessarily have to be like a negative trauma, it could be like if somebody had the most perfect picturesque childhood and had a lovely family and everything like that and everything was perfect, well then maybe that person in particular is gonna be growing up with this mindset that's more like I need to be perfect and I need to please everybody else before I love myself.

It was a big, kind of just looking at both, because I think a lot of times people think of the childhood traumas and past life and things like that that happened in the past that are limiting us today and it doesn't always have to be negative, which I thought was really cool because that is something different that I had never really thought of before.

Yeah.

Where I like ... so yeah, just really about to be able to tap into those unconscious thoughts and limiting beliefs in a way that we can ... because they're always gonna happen, they're always gonna pop up, so in a way to not attach on to them and follow the bouncy ball down the story and down the hole, but really use it in a way to create opportunity for change and to jet forward in some way, but obviously be present with what you're feeling and acknowledge the past, but I feel like so many of us just dwell so much on the past and it's so unnecessary for future personal growth. I've learned a lot about that but that was I think my biggest take away was something a little different.

I love that, and here's a thing I want to say for you guys is like there might be some of you listening who know where your limiting self beliefs come from or your moments of self sabotage, like you have an understanding there was a moment in your childhood or there was a theme in your childhood or there was something like that, but there might be also a lot of you who are like not really having a clue, and that's okay too.

We're not ... it's called our subconscious and our unconscious for a reason, because we're not actually aware of it. It's running all the time, but it's really hard to shine a flashlight into those spaces, and so even probably ... to me, it's felt like almost sometimes like less ... and this maybe relates to what you're saying, almost less important what it was and more important how it's living now, how it's expressing itself now and really working with what's happening in the present and some people finding whatever it was in the past can really bring light to it, but other times, like you were saying, you don't need to dig up the past. You can just move forward and if you notice that there's a pattern that you can start to work on that particular pattern. Honestly, I'll tell you this, you do some work on these patterns, it will probably come up, what it was.

Yeah, and most likely if we don't, I feel, do the inner work in some way, shape, or form, those patterns that are not serving us and are just holding us back from being our best selves and highest selves, I guess, then these patterns that are showing up in our lives, it may be ... it just depends if you're conscious of them or if you're not, at some point if they obviously bother you enough and you continue to do some type of inner work, they'll probably continue to show up. If it's something that's not serving you, it will continue to show up until you deal with it.

So that's just something that's been huge for me in the past year, is just letting go and finding the things that do serve me and using them as energy to move forward.

That ... and I just want to say, that's such a powerful point is to say like if something keeps coming up repetitively, then just know that there's something there and a lot of you guys who follow me maybe know what I'm talking about or what we're talking about when we talk about personal development and things like that, but for those of you who don't and are like, "I have no idea what you guys are talking about," some tools that I found really, really helpful are ... there's a ton of audio books. I'll list a few down below or when I get home, maybe I'll just kind of list out, when I close this video out, I'll list out some of the ones I like to listen to. But audio books, reading, seminars and workshops that are designed to help people kind of break through these things.

Honestly, working with somebody that you know and trust, even getting a therapist is such an amazing option if you can afford that. There are a lot of low income options for that as well. There are even virtual options if you don't have anything close to you, which is ... it's cool that we live in a time where there are so many things available.

For ... I know for both of us, yoga and meditation has played a really big role in that. I think ... in my personal opinion, it's important to have an arsenal of things because I think that ... for me, I found that it wasn't just one thing. It was a combination of a lot of things. It was doing affirmations, it was listening to the audio books, it was attending the seminars and things.

You need to take action.

Yeah, yeah.

Not just let that info float.

You can't just consume ... you can't just consume the information or else it's not doing anything. It's about creating action but also, like I said, maybe trying out a few different things and seeing what resonates with you, and you might find that a couple of things really helpful ... are helpful to you and different things help you at different times.

Thank you for letting me spring that on you.

Yeah, of course.

You'll probably see her quite a bit on this channel. This is one of my dearest, dearest friends and business partner and I just adore her and I love her to pieces. So, I'll see you guys back at home.

So it is actually the next day, because I realized while I was going through and editing all the information, I never sat down and filmed the closing when I got home. So, I am back at my house. Sorry, she's just rolling around over there. I'm back at my house and I don't think I have too much else to add. I was listening to it, and we really got into a lot of depth. Like I said, I'll add some of my favorite audio books down in the comment section, or down in the description. If you have any favorite audio books or podcasts or anything like that, throw them in the comment section below.

Honestly, I haven't been much of a podcast person, but I have so many friends who really love podcasts. I've been really drawn to audio books for some reason. So feel free to hit me with some suggestions if you have any podcasts that you like. If you like this video, hit the like button and feel free to subscribe to my channel. It really supports me here, especially as we get started. Look for some fun stuff. We have Wednesday talking about motivation, talking about health and wellness and then Friday I will officially give you guys the full run down on my puppy, Taber, so you can look forward to that.

Yeah, lots of love guys. Have an awesome week. Happy Monday.